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Sexism reared its slobbering old head again in football and John Robb wonders what will happen when women footballers can play for the clubs…

Andy Gray and Richard Keys are two more relics from a different age, soggy faced dinosaurs, who were caught off mic this week spluttering on about the most dreadful thing ever!
A woman linesman!
These two men’s men just couldn’t take it that a human being with a different arrangement of genitalia was infiltrating on what they perceive as one of the last bastions of manhood- being a linesman, surely even the word linesman looks a bit stupid now as well.
They wondered if she could understand the offside rule, because such sport laws are only understandable to paunchy middle aged humans with cocks.
It was like a flashback to the seventies and bulldog faced men grunting on about women drivers. But is anyone laughing out there?
In 2011 it’s bizarre that anyone cannot handle a woman running alongside a football pitch waving a flag and making sure no-one cheats. Plenty of men don’t seem to understand the offside law either and most players look confused or just carry on playing anyway hoping for the best.
I’m not sure why being woman means that you cannot apparently get a grip on the laws of the game any more or less than a man, maybe Andy Grey knows the answer to this.
What’s he going to do when finally one day a woman footballer gets to the level where she can play in the top divisions. I wish this would happen now, surely the best woman players in the country could easily slip into the first team of, let’s say Port Vale or Hereford? Who can stop them? Surely it would be against the law to prevent such a thing happening.
I can’t wait for the moment when some forward thinking club boss breaks the unsaid code and the world of preening, expensive hair messing, designer clothed, gossip bound, jewellery laden, pouting male dominated world of football is suddenly pulled screaming into the 21st century.

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Award winning journalist and boss of Louder Than War. In a 30 year music writing career, John was the first to write about bands such as Stone Roses and Nirvana and has several best selling music books to his name. He constantly tours the world with Goldblade and the Membranes playing gigs or doing spoken word and speaking at music conferences.


  1. It’ll never happen john, the f.a. has a strict law that bans women from playing against men from the age of nine, although they can play mixed sex footie between the ages of five to nine.

  2. Guardian Podcast is number one audio podcast which suggests that you dont need inane crass out dated comments from the like of Gray and Keys! Why dont the media just try and give us intelligent discussion instead of going with these clowns!

    I am not sure if women will ever play against men as the same wont happen in other sports such as tennis, rugby even swimming. The irony is that the lineswomen was much better than her counterparts with some sharp decisions that were bang on…lets have women commentators instead of Gray who is more whiskey fuelled sweeney era than now

  3. ..and Steve Claridge said on 5 live last night that “deep down at least 50% of football fans would agree with gray and Keys” Off with his head too please – Football is a good reminder of how far behind some things (sexism,homophobia)are in this country.

  4. As close as its come.httpss://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/europe/3093147.stm Think the same club tried to sign colonel GAddafi’s son around the same time?

  5. Football is a MAN’S game. Gray and Keys should both be knighted for their efforts in keeping this working class sense of male pride intact in the 21st century.

  6. I didn’t know Claridge said that – I quite like him as a pundit normally. A shame. If we are lopping off heads in football, can we please do Alan Green too. Even if he’s a fully paid up suffragette….


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