Oh Samantha Brick you’re having a rough time of it on Louder Than War after John’s open letter and now this, but seeing as you see yourself as so beautiful, its hardly going to bother you. So here’s my slant on things, coming from a whole new perspective – that of that the bisexual girl.
Now, I suppose there’s two different ways I can find women attractive- lust or envy. (The type of women I want to look like aren’t the same ones I want to be with.) When I look at Samantha Brick, I feel neither, so its not just men who find her distinctly average. I’ve actually met women like her before. When I was at sixth form college, there was a girl who used to constantly be saying things like, “oh I’m so pretty,” and thought all men adored her and all girls envied her. In the end, girls did end up disliking her immensely, but it was her attitude that caused this, not her (imagined) beauty. My usually lovely friend eventually ended up saying to me about her “she is quite pretty but she’s got a bit of a moon face and buck teeth.” Women will end up being harsh on you with an attitude like that, but its not bitterness, it’s just the acknowledgement of how much you seemingly want to alienate other women. I’ve also found that these kinds of women show a wariness around me; acting on the assumption that I will automatically find them be attracted to them and probably try to make a pass at them – which is both patronising (they don’t find every man attractive so why should I find every woman attractive?) and arrogantly presumptuous (don’t flatter yourselves, ladies.)
And then there’s the “envy” angle. Now envy is something I can feel quite easily towards other women because I see myself slightly below average looking. I wasn’t sure whether to admit how I feel about myself in an LTW blog, but hey, if Samantha Brick can talk about how beautiful she is then I guess I can be equally open. When I look in the mirror, there is very little that I wouldn’t change. In particular I hate my legs and the shape of my face. And yet I’ve always managed to snare good-looking partners (of both sexes, including a high fashion catwalk model), have done some modelling myself, and am often complimented on my hair and sporty abdominal muscle. And yet it’s like I’m always expecting there to be some sort of punchline to this. The evidence suggests my confidence ought to be higher. But as much as I love compliments (I’m only human), I’m never really convinced by them. It’s really sad to say this, but this is probably just a part of being female. We are, by and large, programmed to doubt ourselves.
But apparently not Samantha Brick. I’m not even sure whether to believe her sweeping statements of self-belief; I can’t help but think it’s all a bit of a publicity stunt. If not, she must have been ridiculously flattered and cosseted her whole life. I never experienced this at my tiny school, but friends of mine have enlightened me to the kind of popular schoolgirl who isn’t actually that pretty, but through her reign of power somehow convinces everyone she is and absorbs their flattery; is Brick is anything to go by, for some girls this didn’t end in the playground. And her latest comments that being fat is a failure are utterly reprehensible. There are many reasons why people are overweight (the mere word fat sounds brutal to me.) And body shape is no barometer of success – at least not to anybody who is a half decent person. I bet the pro-anorexia movement cannot believe their look that someone in a mainstream newspaper would make such a sweeping statement. (Even though the press has long shown a fixation with body shape and weight and using it as a weapon against us, the Daily Mail actually being one of the very worst perpetrators.) While eating disorders are complex and it would be patronising to pin their condition on the media, women like Brick should be forced to consider how incredibly dangerous their comments could be before they put them into print. Eating is supposed to be a pleasure, it isn’t a crime, but we are made to feel like it is way too often. The sooner the press starts to reject deluded ramblings of attention seekers like Brick the better. She says all men fancy her, but the evidence appears otherwise. And neither does this woman!