Clint Eastwood talks to a chair (really)
Clint Eastwood talks to a chair (really)
Dear Clint,

I was just watching your speech at the Republican Party convention and was feeling a bit sorry for you.

I’m not sure if this is the reaction that you were after, after all you are the famous maverick gunslinger of movie legend, the grouchy outsider who made a fortune by epitomising a certain fictional part of the American outlaw spirit- an outlaw spirit that was always bit conservative really in hindsight but none the less always very entertaining.

Clint we know you are a fiscal conservative who takes a left-leaning stand on social issues such as gay marriage and environmental protection but you were left to hang out to dry by your chums in the Republican party. The Romney aides were cringing as you stumbled on through your speech and at that weird ad lib when you spoke to an empty chair pretending Obama was sat there and that we don’t like. These cold hearted fish were just using you and you’re bigger than them in real life as well as celluloid life.

We are surprised these lizards let you speak off script. They don’t like that kind of thing at these political rallies where things like Romney’s ‘Human side’ is super scripted and he is made to grin like a robot selling a frozen version of humanity.

Clint, your films were part of our lives- the spaghetti westerns were magnificent but in hindsight we probably misunderstood them. For us they were darkly amoral tales, fantastically entertaining American updates of Kurosawa’s Japanese warrior films. We didn’t realise that they were political manifestos and that you would be getting wheeled out decades later embodying their mythical spirit like they were real life.

I grew up with your films and loved a lot of them and respected your work as a director and your love of jazz music. You have been a consummate artist. A king of Hollywood. I knew you had been a conservative mayor of a rich white enclave of the USA and that you were always going to have problems with Mr. Obama and that’s fair enough, after all we do live in democracy. And sure, Obama has made mistakes and you were right about these draining wars in Iraq and Afghanistan but I’m sure someone else started those when everyone else was saying they will be impossible quagmires to get out of.

It never makes comfortable viewing for the rich white men to get sabre rattling and demand a world where they can get even richer. I know that America and the UK are very different countries with very different histories and we often make the mistake of thinking that we are quite similar.

For us things like the national health Service no matter how crumbly is a thing to be proud of whilst in America the watered down version that is dubbed with a sneer Obamacare is tantamount to communism and the devils work. We have difficulty understanding this mindset especially as the Americans we have met all across your great country have been the most generous hosts and really caring people- these are the bits of America we will never get our heads around.

I’m not even sure why we have so much coverage of your elections apart from them being this bizarre soap opera. Sometimes it seems that we get to see more of the American elections than we do of our own which is sadly quite telling. Meanwhile no-one knows seems to know or cares who runs China and they are second these days in the international politics medal table!

An elder statesman of acting talking at a Republican convention shouldn’t really even be on our radar but it is is because Hollywood used to dominate the planet and you were one of those young kings of the film industry- the James Dean that survived and someone who has become the walking, talking ideal of the American Spirit and until yesterday the John Wayne who seemed to have the smarts.

Your speech at the convention seemed at best a bit awkward and especially the weird bit when you were not too happy with Obama being one of those ‘lawyers, I suppose you forgot that Mitt Romney was also a lawyer before he joined super rich club out of touch with the problems of America.

It looks like the man you are championing, Mr. Romney will possibly become the president and this wakes us nervous over here. We don’t really understand what he stands for apart from getting richer and making a dangerous world even more dangerous. We hope this is not true but it makes us edgy.

Clint, people are being rude about you on the internet. That’s the modern way. I guess you will do you famous flinch if you ever look at that kind of stuff. You are one of the untouchables and we try to ignore your ramblings as typical out of touch super rich waffle.

It’s not that you are Republican that surprises us, after all aren’t all rich white actors and rock stars Republican or their equivalent these days. It’s not that you are old, after all normally age accrues a certain wisdom and we unfashionably respect the old here.

It’s just there is always something bit uncomfortable about watching the super rich trying to put the world to rights and even if your concerns were about the unemployed and messy wars it really was weird watching you lecture the empty chair pretending Obama was there and saying more in that speech than in all your classic films put together.

As you finished with a quid ‘Go Ahead punk make my day’ we were not sure whether to laugh or cry. Was this all being played for laughs or was that really Dirty Harry up there with guns blazing or an actor, in 2012 everything is so blurred that fake reality is the new Hollywood and politics is show business for ugly people…

8 COMMENTS

  1. well said! didn’t see clint’s spot myself but sounds as if he’s being used by the elephants as the new charlton heston ‘grand old man of the rifle wielding, homo-erotic, gunslinging, right to bear arms, hang em, fry em, chain em, send em back, small government, big money, war mongering, torture loving, oil grabbing, zero tax paying’ commie/muslim hatin’ mid-west god fearin’ abortion hatin’ te aparty hockey mom, bud swliin’ demographic

  2. well, i suppose Clint was racist, homophobe, nature destroyer, human kind destroyer, nativ american destrutive, sold to capitalism system and to new world order, etc… it’s very distressing. so he made films just for money and to conditioned people… like “avatar”. US people are not superior to the other, war is out, conservatism is out

  3. Great article, whether Obama is good or bad, lets hope Romney doesn’t succeed. As for Mr Eastwood, very, very sad.
    Dennis Munday

  4. The most embarrassing part was that it was obviously fuelled by drink, if you can’t sup it Clint, don’t touch it. Hairdresser!

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  6. Clintee Eastwood is a “pussy.” has he ever been in the military? Lot’s tough talk and bravado! Just like a lot of “Wanna Bees! Sorry sack of crap!

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