ROCK and ROLL! These are the key words to remember with New Artist of the Day Atomic Suplex! Keith Goldhanger tells us all about them!
Have ya got 30 seconds?
Then i’ll start.
OK? (cue COUNTDOWN theme tune)
(Starts clock….pauses) 1,2….1234…..!
Atomic Suplex are a four piece but were nearly whittled down a three piece after guitarist Emma drank a Dutch canal dry sometime last year after falling into it (twice) followed by lead singer “Suplex 98” (Stuart to his GP) who had to go through some intense brain therapy from a Doctor who’s son used to be in the STUPIDS. His medical records currently list his occupation as “Punk Rock Singer”. This may one day save his life. However, no one died and recently Atomic Suplex have returned to being a four piece again and are about to just carry on as though absolutely nothing ever happened.
They wear ripped skinny jeans (black) and spread their legs like the Ramones used to when playing live. The aforementioned second guitarist (long hair) and bass player (Dan May) both share the same mic for backing vocals. The bass player and drummer (JD Kickdrum) both have moustaches and the lead singer wears a leather jacket with tassles, sports a studded belt, plays a flying V guitar (with a white lightning logo on the strap) and screams his way through all the songs that are twelve times more raw and distorted as Elvis intended, and as short and loud as all good shouty rock and roll songs should be. There’s also a Saxophone player (which fucks with my maths) but I’ve not ever seen him. He could be floating in a canal somewhere unidentified (face down). If you see him I’ve been told his name is “XLB”*
Lead singer “Suplex 98” also wears a black motorcycle crash helmet with a (tinted) visor so you can’t see the whites of his eyes and has a microphone attached to the side of it so he doesn’t need a microphone stand and has the ability to wander into the audience and jump up and down whilst still singing (shouting) and playing his V-shaped axe. They sound like all those old rock and roll bands from the 60’s, like Bill Hayley and Little Richard, but louder and distorted to fuck. And you love them already just by reading this and will love them even more once you hit the play button.
In between shows they probably sit in dark damp alleyways writing lists of future song titles a bit like the ones they already have, called things such as ‘I am Rock & Roll’ and ‘Rock & Roll Must Die’ and ‘Rock & Roll is Never Gonna Die’….things like that.
On the front of the crash helmet is the word “ROCK” and the word “ROLL”!
Here’s what it sounds like…
* “XLB” or DAN EXELBY as he is known by his GP is actually about to embark on a bike ride across 25 countries in aid of “Leukaemia & Lymphoma Research” because he wants people to know “leukaemia can be beaten”. Which apparently it can. Because he did. He can be sponsored at https://www.justgiving.com/25years25counties
Words by Keith Goldhanger. More writing by Keith on Louder Than War can be found here.