Fat White Family Appeal – They Need Your Cash So They Can Play America!Touring America is a financial nightmare for a british band these days…flights, van hire, petrol, drugs (maybe not) and visas only rich kids can afford the stateside jaunt. Let’s not let the yanks think we were about Coldplay though- fat White Family have sent out a cheeky appeal for your cash so they can tour the USA … Their appeal is below…

Fat White Family – Urgent Appeal – help send them to America

Dearest Public,

Opportunity has knocked at the door of the Fat White Family, yet due to our fiercely independent nature (and total absence of record company support) we at the moment cannot afford to answer it.

We have been invited across the Atlantic to play a string of shows at the SXSW music festival in Austin, Texas, followed by a tour of the eastern seaboard finishing up in New York City. Bands are not paid for playing this disgusting industry hoedown, and first time fees stateside will barely cover gas and the one motel room we are likely to share each night after the shows. Indeed, even as I write this in the bowels of the Queen’s Head on Stockwell Road, the only thing perpetuating my will to exist is a Sainsbury’s ‘Taste the Difference’ Spaghetti Bolognese I weighed in as potatoes at the self service check out (88p nice!).

Alas, my budget for flying out to tour America currently stands at £3.47. With the rest of the group languishing in similar or worse financial hopelessness, we are turning to you, sisters and brothers, to fund our venture; don’t let those yanks go away thinking that all this country produces is middle of the road, safe as houses homogenized industry crap, send them the Fat White Family, make a difference, make a pledge….

In return for your pledge we are offering ourselves up body and soul, for the next 6 weeks we are on sale. You can have the band come around to your house and cook you dinner, you can have any member of the band give you a special massage, you can purchase a 25 track limited edition anthology of rarities and b-sides, you can have us do some casual labour on your property, there is no low to which we shall not comfortably stoop; the future of bad taste is in your hands, don’t let it slide through your fingers and mucky your shoes.

– Lias Saoudi

The list of available ‘delights’ include:

  • Special massage from any member of The Fat White Family
  • Primal Scream workshop with Lias
  • Drum lessons with Dan
  • Dinner for two with The Fat White Family cooked by Nathan
  • Dance, and sing backing vocals on stage with FWF
  • Personalised answerphone message
  • Night out with FWF
  • Tattoo by Dan
  • Special FWF anthology CD of rare tracks with handmade artwork
  • Be in the next video
  • Yuppies Out pipe
  • One man band show with Adam

For the full list of items go to: https://www.pledgemusic.com/projects/fatwhitefamily/.

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