Def Leppard to release more crap

Whilst chilling in the sumptuous LTW relaxation area earlier today I was suddenly jolted from my general feelings of tranquillity by an odd noise; it was both a deep bass rumble, and a screeching metallic whine ”“ Confused I looked around to try and identify the source of the noise; was it a newly discovered Test Dept bootleg or an advance copy of a new Flats track?

After checking quite what was playing on the stereo the harsh realisation dawned upon me… it was the sound of the very bottom of the barrel being scrapped.

Poodle haired rockers Def Leppard have today announced that they are to release an album of lullabies this summer.
The album to be called ”˜Dreamin’ With Def Leppard’ will consist of 12 re-recorded Leppard classics (I didn’t realise they had a single classic) including ”˜Love Bites’, ”˜Animal’ and ”˜Pour Some Sugar On Me’ but recorded in a softened style suitable for babies!

The evil brains behind this concept is a company called Rock The Cradle who together with US based eOne Music and Happiness Records plan on a whole series of similar releases from other artists.

We are currently looking at ways of preventing this release, believing it to constitute a crime against humanity.



The Author

Words by

Share and comment

6 comments on “Def Leppard to release more crap”

Leave a comment?
  1. I always knew Def Leppard were a pile of stinking sh!te, but ‘eavens above – what the ‘ell is going on ‘ere? Poor kids been subjected to a blubbery sixty year old man subjected the poor little blighter to Pour Some Sugard On Me. I expect to see that kid on Jeremy Kyle in 16 years time, accusing their parents of mental cruelty….

    Especially since Sheffield produced such an astongishing amount of good music in the later seventies / early eighties, why, oh, why were Def Leppard so successful?

    • Apologies for the awful grammar, I was so appalled by Joe Elliott and his be-mulleted cronies inflicting themselves on another generation of the human race, I became all stupid for a moment there!

  2. I’m confused. I’m no DL fan but Louder Than War recently praised the ‘new’ Beady Eye album and that’s nothing if not retro, hair oriented pop so what makes one thing ‘cool’ and the other ‘not cool’? I thought new media came with a blast of fresh air, this just seems like stale music press prejudice in a social media setting.

    • Beady Eye and Def Lappard is written by two different people with different opinions…

    • It has nothing to do with either ‘cool’ or ‘retro’ as such I do not see the reason to link this to a piece regarding Beady Eye.
      This is to do with an artist/band agreeing to alter their sound to such an extent it is able to be marketed as being soporific to infants. How desperate can DL and their label be to generate an income?? Surely DL should be proud of their music and refuse to alter it – they wrote it, they knew what sound they were creating so why change it in such an odd way.
      Lastly, if DL are proud of this forthcoming project; why is there no mention of it on any of the bands ‘official’ sites etc

  3. Phil’s opinions on music are clearly as reliable as his sub-editing skills. Perhaps this album does represent DL ‘scrapping’ the barrel but this contrived sense of indignation at the thought of a band cashing in on a novelty release is as tedious as the hair related insults spouted by Newall and Sahara.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Get Your Tickets At Skiddle

To buy tickets for our events please visit: Skiddle.

Tickets by Skiddle