Charlie Boyer and the Voyeurs, Filthy Boy
Hoxton Bar and Kitchen, London
4th March 2013
Louder Than War’s Keith Goldhanger goes out on a Monday night and extols the vitues of shit hair and ace tunes.
Some of us feel indirectly responsible for bits of this.
This label is run by the bloke who we used to donate bits of our giro to many years ago in order to stand in a dark room in North West London to watch things called “The House of Love” and “My Bloody Valentine” (Pound NOTES in them days…). If he was lucky he’d be given a cassette of whatever we’d just spend our life savings on, and this demo would be carefully placed in a carrier bag with the dozens of others that everyone else in the audience had given him – That bit wasn’t compulsory but a lot of us did it.
– He wouldn’t know me nowadays. I look old and bedraggled.
But I saw him in this room tonight…(Jeff!! Jeeeeeeff!!!!…silence…JEEEEEEEEEEFF !!!) …….like I say ..he wouldn’t recognise me nowadays…
I saw him with his mate who’s in that band with a new CD out at the moment that I still haven’t listened to…… (“One hundred and thirty five fuckin quid, just cos my mate threw an oil drum off stage.? …oh, and a shopping trolley!!!!!”)
Anyway ……it’s worth noting that Heavenly have a rather healthy list of cool bands on their books at the moment (Pieces of which were also in attendance this evening – A good turn out for a Monday)
These bands seem to have a couple of things in common.
1) Shit Hair
2) Ace Music
We are currently on the verge of seeing and hearing a lot of these bands who a lot of people out there will enjoy voicing their opinions on soon because a lot of people will love these bands and a lot of people will swoon over the nonsense presented before their diminishing eyesight that they’ll see on the telly and in the papers. It’ll divide a nation. Some people won’t like it. Hairdressers will all be made redundant and everyone will be stealing flowers out of people’s gardens just to tie them together and wrap them around their fuckin heads. As a neutral observer, I think this’ll all be bloody brilliant entertainment.
Oh and the Internet. You’ll probably read about them on the Internet (see, got that bit right didn’t I?) and lots of people will feel betrayed because it’s not Brit pop or heavy metal or shoegazing. Well it might be a bit like shoegazing actually. Who was on the door taking the money so we could see SLOWDIVE all those years ago….. ? Yeah probably the same man signing these bands, and therefore guilty by association.
There’ll be a backlash. And once a backlash begins…..THAT is when we can have room put aside especially for it in those big record shops that no one goes to anymore.
But not yet .
Maybe next month or maybe the third week in September eh?
If you’re after a stereotypical vision of what Hoxton is meant to look like in 2013 …… (Queue coach loads of Japanese tourists walking around the square looking disappointed as they struggle to find people to take pictures of) then this evening in this room might please those looking for something to dwell on.
Anyway, there’s nothing wrong with having a shit haircut . Especially if you’re in a band. Especially one of those bands that sound a bit like those ones we saw when the world was in black and white and things such as Colour, as well as pound coins and the Internet were yet to be invented.
I’ve had one for years and sometimes, if you’re looking to piss a few people off and be noticed – it helps.
Charlie Boyer must have spent fuckin years trying to find not only a backing band that rhymes with his name but one that looks like they inhabit the same planet. He has also managed to write some decent tunes that hopefully we’ll be able to hear spread along a piece of plastic one day (end of May apparently) and not have to go out on a Monday evening to bloody Hoxton when we could have been standing outside the O2 waiting for our teenage children to be released from that fuckin Beiber concert that’s just over ran by about three and a half weeks!!! -Of course, it’s the parents that deserve to be blamed so a big middle finger to those getting angry and squeezing onto the last tubes home looking and acting like a bunch of Chilean miners that have just been rescued . These People, so called “parents” really should have bought their children up listening to things like the “House of Love” or “My Bloody Valentine”. Then we’d ALL be in the Hoxton bar + Kitchen together and not all spread out around East London on a cold evening trying to co-ordinate a reasonable bed time for the gig goers of the night.
The support band are called FILTHY BOY.
This information is not entirely 100% correct. There’s four of them and they’re not Filthy enough. Which is a shame, but don’t run away because this lot might end up being fanbloodytastic if it wasn’t a Monday evening. I’m hoping to catch them again one day, say … after a nine week tour without any days off and with them sporting split lips and black eyes due to a fist fight they’ve just had with each other due to over excessive drinking bouts and van fatigue. It’s all a bit too polite this evening and it’s a little Arctic Monkeys. However, I have faith in this lot. They’re the closest thing in years to the BIRTHDAY PARTY. In between now and the next time I see these I’m going to be breaking into their houses and swapping all their organic veg for some high class Harribos. Maybe they don’t need this. Maybe they’ve just had their eight hours kip and five a day.? Maybe they are all nice boys and wanting them to be the Birthday Party is asking a bit too much but they have a song called JIMMY JAMMIES and its ace, and you’ll love it the 1st time you hear it. Then you’ll be curious to hear another tune of theirs and that’ll wet your appetite as well. There’s some great lines of prose coming out of this south London boy’s gob and I reckon we’ll all go mental over these in the future. Watch this space as they say ….but please fuck it all up a bit will you boys. ANGER …I want ANGER… I want to be scared again. Can we have some bands that scare the living daylights out of an audience please?…someone…anyone… make the kids wanna fight …(not real fighting, that’s silly..punch the air. It won’t scream and it won’t fight back)
The first time I set eyes on Charlie Boyer and the Voyeurs they were shit.
And I told them (outside – whilst someone held my coat).
OK…so my belly was a bit full of “Mad Goose” (it’s an alcoholic beverage. it’s tastes good) , but as Frank Carson used to say “It’s the way you tell ’em”
They’d turned up at a gig, plugged in, made a racket, stood their ground and got through thirty minutes in front of an audience standing there with fingers in both ears. We’d heard the magic single called “I watch you” by then and we could tell that they had the swagger, and the tunes and the look that displays to a massed audience who is in charge. It was brilliantly shit as opposed to embarrassingly shit – We knew there’d be better days ahead and a couple of these have been witnessed since.
The second time supporting label mates TOY they were like this evening and that, in my adolescent manner of describing things was Fucking brilliant.
With a voice that can cut through the mesh of noise coming from the four “Voyeurs” and a glance through the fringes at each other when it’s time to change the tempo we have a band here that can get carried away with one riff one minute and change tempo my the slight nod of a head the next. We’re reminded of Television (the band not the thing over in the corner of your living room that doesn’t get switched on any more) and Wire and Loop and of course the Velvet Underground. With a bit more chaos we might be leaning a little on Jesus and Mary Chain territory. Once or twice and during a song where Mr Boyer asks us to “Be Nice” we think of those early black and white films of blokes that were once and still are known as “The QUO”- Mystery song in case you’re wondering.
Yeah it’s a racket and I’m sure Edwyn Collins had hours of fun pulling it all apart and separating all the noises in order for us to all be able to hear these songs in the comfort of our homes later this year. An album that’ll represent the year (and a few gone by) rather well If these songs we’ve heard so far are anything to go on.
Don’t shout about it too much but these blokes in these bands on this label with their shit haircuts and ace tunes all seem to know each other and all seem to hang out together. Maybe they even live together for all we know and it shouldn’t take the likes of me to mention that when this sort of thing goes on in this town ……
…. all it needs is a catchy name and we’re off and running !
All words by Keith Goldhanger. You can find more work by Keith on Louder Than War here.