tthm_LouderThanWarLogoDear Mr. Lloyd Webber,

Your are indeed a strange and selfish little man and we doubt we can appeal to any humanity left in your gold plated but ultimately ice cold soul.

For years we have had to put up with your corny musicals fill of caterwauling and hollering and then there was you awkward appearances on TV talent shows as some kind of judge where you sat there like some kind of amphibian passing judgement on the desperate and the needy as they tried to enter your world. It was like the last days of Rome replayed for the 21st century nervous breakdown.

Still we could have put with all of this and let it all slip by in the name of showbiz – a place where fortunes are made from shiny baubles and snake oil salesmen but then this week arrived.

Now, in this life there are rich people and very rich people. The world is fucked because a few people have grabbed everything. Some of them sit there counting their money in their gothic mansions, some give it away to charity but some seem to take great pleasure in making the poor even poorer.

This week whilst we were celebrating that strange and arcane institution the House Of Lords doing something useful and making a stand against the slippery ad-man Cameron and his evil side kick George Osbourne. The fusty old Lords standing against their latest wheeze of crushing the spirit and the finances of the poor Sherrif Of Nottingham style. The nasty pair were keen to rob the last few groats from the peasants of England by slashing the poor people’s tax credits and the Lords defeated but then it came to our attention that some of those Lords had decided to vote with the bad guys.

It didn’t seem to be enough for them that they already had everything. It was like they had some psychotic need to rub everyone else’s faces deeper into the mire.

Where is Robin Hood when you need him!

The House Of lords itself is an anachronism, a place where the unelected sit and is one of the last vestiges of feudal England – an old chums place full of the cranky and the weird with the occaisonal good soul but standing up against the Tories at their Sherrif of Nottingham worst makes it loveable for a few days…


There are still some unelected members who are worth £650 million flying in from New York to vote in favour of Osbourne’s plan to impoverish millions of people in the UK. For this person in particular it was the first time they had bothered to vote on the House Of Lords for over two years so it was obviously something they felt really strongly about – you would have thought that in two years there would have been something else to feel strongly about Mr. Lloyd Webber…because this person who flew in was you.

Mr. Lloyd Webber – A multi millionaire feeling strongly that poor people should be poorer….all we want to as ask you is how do you sleep…

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Award winning journalist and boss of Louder Than War. In a 30 year music writing career, John was the first to write about bands such as Stone Roses and Nirvana and has several best selling music books to his name. He constantly tours the world with Goldblade and the Membranes playing gigs or doing spoken word and speaking at music conferences.


  1. The spelling mistakes in this are EMBARRASSING. For pities sake, if you’re gonna attack make sure you don’t look like a dick. I hope this wasn’t sent to Weber.

  2. Sod the spelling mistakes, this was obviously straight from the heart.

    Mr Lloyd-Webber is a repulsive individual. I mean what dwells within his soul, not a comment on his amphibious appearance which, well, it speaks for itself.

    Did he fly in first-class, d’ya reckon, sipping vintage champagne, having his neck massaged by some poor sod as he considered the plight of the poor tory government and how frightfully difficult they were finding bringing back sweatshops, slavery and starvation for the hard working who are committing the crime of not being paid very much, the lazy shirkers.

    How I weep for the travails of multi-millonaires and am grateful I do not have to carry such a burden.

  3. and this is the reason Lloyd webber couldn’t have written a musical as good as Les Miserables, cos he hasn’t a bloody clue
    Do you hear the people sing?
    Singing a song of angry men?
    It is the music of a people
    Who will not be slaves again!
    When the beating of your heart
    Echoes the beating of the drums
    There is a life about to start
    When tomorrow comes!

  4. Agree with you but do yourself a favour and read it through before posting next time. Having so many typos and missing words ruins the flow.

  5. Well said John. A mindset is being achieved by the rich where there is absolutely no social conscience. Change is coming, it has too, but not fast enough.

  6. HOW MANY TIMES did I inform Mr Robb that Les Mis was a fantastic musical .. exactly because of those lyrics???

    Do any of you know how HARD the establishment tried to get that musical shut down? Critics snarled and screamed, but the public just kept coming and money talks. As a student at that bastion of Cultural Marxist bullshit, (Goldsmiths), I well remember a tutor coming in to a seminar… frothing at the mouth and screaming blue murder because he’d gone to see the opening night of Les Mis, and the message (based on Christian social justice) got him all upset, as did the set design.. he screamed at us “And then the scenery FUCKED”… referring to the back sets that joined together. Oh yes. They tried hard to get rid of it… they did not succeed.

    All these nasty comments about ALW will not do. I had the pleasure of being taken to his place for supper after a show, and seeing the Robert Heindel’s on the wall… standing in amazement. He told me about them. He’s a kind, intelligent and compassionate human being, and he helps many artists of all varieties and creeds.

    So why did he vote in a way that seems to be cruel to the poor?
    I believe that he was told do that.
    By who?
    We won’t ever know for sure, but if you think about Marlowe’s Dr Faustus, you may be able to draw your own conclusions.

    • Are you kidding me? His music is lowest common denominator bilge. He hasn’t even got the intelligence or musicality to plagiarize well. Compassionate and humanitarian? Helping artists? Are you completely deranged? Do you know how much he pays people who play his “music”? Do you also therefore know how massively exactly those people would be affected should the cuts to tax credits go through? Just because someone invited you to their house does not automatically confer sainthood. Prat.

    • It was a 3 line whipped right through, abstain at your peril. They’ve actually brought people from hospital beds to vote a 3 line whipped debate before. (Hence being whipped into shape etc comes from). Not the first time either they’ve been flown back, both commons and Lord’s.

  7. I totally agree well said ,these people are so detached from normal working life and how family’s truly struggle .to think they can claim £300 a day to have the privilege to have a say on something they can not even comprehend .this very British farce should be scrapped so out of date and jobs for the boys it makes my blood boil . And just for one person sorry about any spelling mistakes send me to the tower

  8. This is the same person who has lobbied hard for government handouts to pay for doing up his private sector commercial theatres.

  9. Please proof-read your work before you post. If your aim is to communicate effectively, well, you will need to communicate effectively. A text riddled with mistakes is about the worst way of going about it. I will proof-read your texts, if you like. I have some experience. I make mistakes all the time, and my proof-reading, disabled wife was killed by the Tories last year, so I have much hatred and bitterness to discharge. Dear God, am I keen.

  10. when you think of the fact that his musicals rely on mostly self employed musicians, this is where it gets so much more annoying to me. Most self employed musicians are likely to need tax credits at some point, most especially in the start of their career yet this cretin has decided it’s ok to fuck over the people who he wouldn’t have any of his shite shows without. id love to see all the acting community, theatre companies and musicians refuse to touch any of his work again.

  11. Most “self employed musicians” don’t JUST work in theatre, they also teach, compose and perform in adverts, pull pints and generally do what MOST people do in the arts… They earn money as best they can…
    Of course
    If they are Indie Musicians, they can take the time honoured option known as “Making your girlfriend pay the bills and cheating on her from time to time”


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